Lack of empathy in relationships that is NOT narcissistically driven ....

Okay here I am talking about finally approaching this subject with my primary relationship now. 

and my phone ran out so this is a continuation.

The story continues with Khaled being ten years old in the small city of Ismailia Egypt during the onset of the six day war with Israel.  He was crouched in the basement of his parents' huge apartment building for foreigners when the bombing took place.  During those days nobody knew how long they be trying to avoid being blasted to bits like the building above.  He and his eleven brothers and sisters were there a full seven days with their mother.   When the War was over, he was sent for bread in the streets where he saw body parts blown to bits.  The mind of a ten year old absorbed this trauma and wanted to do something for someone.  something right.  Inevitably he was attacked anyway for voicing his concerns and feelings during this time of extremes.   His mother was juggling 12 children and likely a pregnancy...  her marital issues, and the fact that everything they had worked for and loved was gone.  A ten year old's perspective and emotional need wasn't a priority.  It was then Khaled said that his defenses about feeling emotion were born.  And the hold this has on him is powerful my friends. .. very powerful.